Jeremiah 20:14-18
“Curse the day I was born! The day my mother bore me— a curse on it, I say! And curse the man who delivered the news to my father: ‘You’ve got a new baby—a boy baby!’ (How happy it made him.) Let that birth notice be blacked out, deleted from the records, And the man who brought it haunted to his death with the bad news he brought. He should have killed me before I was born, with that womb as my tomb, My mother pregnant for the rest of her life with a baby dead in her womb. Why, oh why, did I ever leave that womb? Life’s been nothing but trouble and tears, and what’s coming is more of the same.”
“Yet I curse the day I was born! May no one celebrate the day of my birth. I curse the messenger who told my father, ‘Good news—you have a son!’ Let him be destroyed like the cities of old that the LORD overthrew without mercy. Terrify him all day long with battle shouts, because he did not kill me at birth. Oh, that I had died in my mother’s womb, that her body had been my grave! Why was I ever born? My entire life has been filled with trouble, sorrow, and shame.”
In Verse 13 Jeremiah lifts praise to God. Then suddenly he changes to this lament where it is clear he suffers from depression. It seems he is like Peter who took his eyes off of Jesus on the Lake of Galilee and began to sink. Peter’s momentary distraction was the storm. Jeremiah’s is the pain for carrying God’s word to a rebellious people. His entire existence is wrapped up in it and there is no escape. No wonder he is depressed. We should not be surprised when stress uses up our neurotransmitters and we fall into depression. God’s call to us may be a simple, “Follow me,” but it is far from easy. When we turn to God for help, find him standing close, and he heals by enfolding us in his wings, our pain is eclipsed by his glory, and it is utterly worth it.
Lord, I’ve been fighting this monster again lately. Please help me. Restore my body, comfort my soul. Make me strong to face the next bout and walk through to the other side where your glory is abundant, and tears and sorrow fade away.